Monday, April 18, 2011

The Monday Nut...Donut Police

As all good things need protecting, so goes it with donuts. Police and donuts have long been synonymous, and there's an interesting history to that. After WWII when GI's returned to the US, craving the dough boys which were fried up for them overseas, the donut revolution exploded and with it the franchised donut shop. One enterprising business man, Bill Rosenberg, the founder of Dunkin Donuts, had the brilliant idea to welcome local police officers into his shops. His reasoning being, if police were welcome then crime would be averted; smart thinking. When is the the last time you have every heard of a donut shop getting robbed?? They don't. Can you imagine a criminal trying to rob a donut shop... it might go something like this:

Crook: "Give me all your money."
Clerk:  "Ah, ok whatever you say sir." "Would you like some donuts as well?"
Crook: "No."
Clerk: "Are you sure?"
Crook: "Um..yes."
Clerk: "No one turns down a donut."
Crook: "Well I did, so just give me the cash and.."
Clerk: "But you hesitated. You didn't just say "yes" when I asked it you were sure, you said um first."
Crook: "I did?" "No I didn't." "Well, so what if I did."
Clerk: "So I think you do want a donut but you're afraid to admit it."
Crook: " WHAT!!??" "Why you little....hey, is that a jelly?"
Clerk: "Yes, just out of the oven."
Crook: "Give me one of those."
Clerk: "Sugared of plain?"
Crook: "Plain please, oh and a medium coffee while you're at it."
Clerk: "Anything else?"
Crook: " Well, just make it a half dozen...actually, I'll just take a seat at the bar here if you don't mind."
Clerk: "So you're not going to rob us?"
Crook: "What?...oh that, ya I forgot." " Nah, I need you to keep making these donuts."

Of course the crook has missed the fact that he is already surrounded by police on all sides so he's done for, but I suppose we can credit that to "Donut Distraction."

In the event you too want to join the ranks of Donut defense, The Paper Magic Group has devised the
"Donut Police Costume". That way if you find you're local shop under served by the police, or if you just like wearing Halloween costumes all year, never fear your prayers have been answered.